so, i haven't posted in awhile. my life's been kinda busy lately with school and band. now here comes this new complications: GUYS!
i have a great guy in my life by the name of binaca (i call him my BEE). we've been talking since march and we just have tons in common. we just recently hooked up in june and things have been okay, until i got back to TSU. see, i'm here in houston and he's in shreveport, which is not that far, but when you don't have transportation, things can get sticky.
i love him with all my heart, but sometimes phone conversations can only go so far. i really want him to transfer to TSU so we can be together, but he really loves grambling. the only reason he would consider TSU is just because of me and i don't want that to be the only factor for him to come here. things are just ugh right now and here comes a new addition: charles.
charles is a guy i met before me and BEE got serious. he's older, like i'm 19 (20 in two weeks ) and he is 25, plus he has a daughter. i know that's alot of baggage to handle, but he is super cool and an extra plus is he's KKΨ. we started to hang out around the end of spring semester and i was totally into him, like wanted to be with him into him. things were going great until the summer hit and i only heard from him twice. i didn't know where we stood, so i moved on to BEE. now that i'm back in houston, we kinda picked up where we left off and i'm starting to feel him even more.
i told BEE about me liking charles and it made him so sad. he wishes he can be with me, but we both know it's not possible right now. he feels like he's making me miserable cause he can't give me what i want. i tell him all the time that you don't have to succome to all of my wants, but he tries so hard to. he's the only one i do love, but i do fear that if me and charles continue to get closer and closer, i could start to develop that love for him too. things are just crazy right now, i don't know what to do :/