i'm trying to let go, but it's hard to do. i really want to be just happy with where i am in my life right now, but it's hard. like seriously, i don't know what i want for me in life. i can tell you my goals and where i want to be in my career, but when it comes to me personally, i go blank.
i try to take advice from everybody, but i still seem to float my own boat when it comes to my happiness. my sis and friends tell me to move on, that you're too young to be in a serious relationship. i kinda agree, at this point of my life, i don't think i'm ready to be fully committed. plus, i need to work on the things i'm dealing with internally before i can be a girlfriend to anybody.
but secretly, i wanna have somebody to call my own. i wanna be loved and have that affection that i crave so much. i totally screwed my relationship with BEE just cause i wanted to continue things with charles, but now i don't even now if charles was ever feeling me like that.
i'm trying to let go, one step at a time. first, i need to read my dear charles letter to him so i can see how he really feels about me. second, i just need to focus on me and better myself. ugh... things just look so bleek in my life.